Thursday, December 26, 2013
today
Today I can admit that I was angry yesterday; Angry at the unfairness of loving without return; Angry that sometimes good dreams still die; Angry about loss.
Today, having acknowledged my anger, I was able to let it go, mostly. There are worse things than unrequited love, like not loving. Today I'm grateful for being clean so that I could know my anger. If I had eaten to numb it, I would have taken all that anger and turned it on myself and then I would have been doubly angry!
Today was a wonderful mix of good company, walks in the cold, play, generous gifts, food and drinks...in that order! I am the most blessed person in the world to have such a wonderful family. They are all uniquely wonderful (read weird) and I appreciate the few add ons we have sometimes too. Thanks Danny, for sharing your family!
Today I am deliriously tired and happy. I also tossed all the leftover treats, squares etc in the garbage.
Love to all, elly
"Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!" Dr. Seuss
"Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain... To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it." Kevyn Aucoin
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Must be doubly tough for you to throw food out. What with your upbringing, combined with your addiction. Good on you for continuing with the smart decisions.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think that unrequited love is a tricky thing to get a handle on. Sometimes we say we love each other, and yet we don't "feel" loved by each other. That of course is what we are really after, and it's frustrating when we believe that we are giving our love, yet don't "feel" like we're getting it back. Just thinking out loud, as I am want to do at times. :)
Love
Peter