out of control

Yup, totally over the edge, off the wagon, over the hill and far far away! I really lost it today. For the last few days I've been trying to figure out what's going on inside, pushing me here. I continue to watch and listen as I try to figure it out. I got my happy lamp out early, as we've had so little sun lately and it's been downright cold. It can't hurt...

I did go to the Dr on Friday and was not overly encouraged. I'm going for blood work and ultrasound and xrays of my shoulders, but I don't think he has any clue about the numbness and tingling I've been having. He checked all my joints and I know he thinks there's nothing wrong with me. Silly man!!

I think maybe I need the kids to visit more, as I really miss them. It's been such a busy chaotic summer, I haven't had enough "grandkid" fixes!

I primed the bathroom today and the unpainted areas in the kitchen. I hope to get paint for the living area tomorrow.

For today, it is enough. Good enough, hard enough, busy enough, tired enough, smart enough; enough; I am enough.

"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Munroe

Love, elly